Perhaps someone will say: Does anyone will not talk? In real life, there is indeed a light car, it is very good at talking, and some people are in the unmantening, and there is no discussion. So what should you pay attention to when talking? Dr. Elkin, expert Elkin, expert in the US research language, believes that the following three aspects are very important for success, and master the relevant skills can improve the ability of people to talk, and achieve good communication results.
Choose a right topic
When people talk, they are usually selected by people who start speaking. Everyone has expressed their opinions around this topic, and then turn to another topic, so it is very important to choose the right topic. If the topic selected can be accepted by everyone, the conversation will be smoothly carried out. If you choose an unsuitable topic, you can't afford your interest, no one has responded, and the conversation failed. Sometimes you may have the right to have someone else to sit down and listen to you, they may pretend to listen to you with your heart, but you can't force others to speak. Inappropriate topics have the following types:
1. Those who talk about their own topics, some people talk about their lives, and now people may have interest, and people have lost interest and even hide the conversant.
2. Topics about taboos, such as couple relationships, contradictions between family members, unwilling to talk about diseases, etc. If some people don't want others to listen to their own economic sources or economic conditions. Therefore, these topics are best not to touch unless the other party takes place.
3. False topics, fake topics refers to those who are unable to continue, if you use "Today's weather" to start talking, it will respond to convenience. If you find that the people around you don't want to talk to you, then you have to check that you have problems in choosing topics. The method of checking is as follows: With a week, you can write down all the topics you selected when you talk to others. If some topics are repeated, the number will be recorded later. This gives a list of topics you choose. Check the topic of the number of times, ask yourself two questions: If others always talk about this topic, do you want to hear? If you don't want to listen, why?
Conversation in a certain order
People's conversation is conducted in a certain order. I don't want to say anything. I want to say when I want to say it. When talking, the talkient and listener can make each other to make the conversation smoothly. If there are three people in A, B, and C talk together, the ideal conversation method is as follows:
1. A first started speaking, he chose a topic to spend a few words around it.
2. A Continue to talk through some methods.
3. B took the words, talking about the topic of the A choice.
4. B Select C as the next convessor.
5. C I took the B's words, talking about a few words.
6. C Select a as the next convessor.
7. This process has been going down until everyone feels that this topic has nothing to say or the time is running out. Everyone has rough equal opportunities and time in this process, and others can only listen to others when a person speaks.
8. The last person summarizes the topic of A, which indicates that the topic is over, which can lead to another topic.
It is in the rules of this speaker and the interchange position of the listener, and the conversation can be held smoothly. This rule seems like traffic rules, even if there is no police command, everyone will comply with the rules of the red light parking, otherwise it will make traffic blocked. The rules of the conversation are obvious as there is no traffic rules, but it is also strictly observed. According to these rules, talents participating in the conversation can decide to join a conversation or avoidance according to their needs. If you want to join the conversation, you must wait for the person to talk to the words when he is finished. If you interrupt others during this, it will be considered impolite. And if you want to give the topic to the next person, you have to stop, suggest that you have finished. There are two bad habits to be corrected, one is to say while thinking, there is no pause in the middle of the sentence, making the people who are obedient to judge whether you have finished. The other is constant, there is no stopplay, and people have to interrupt your words. Give the topic to others can adopt a variety of means, except for the pause mentioned above, including a problem, specifying someone comments. But it indicates that the important clues of the end of the conversation are touching. If the converser contacts your gaze, it indicates that he chose you as the next conversant. The same method can be used when you are ready to give the voice to others. So if you don't want to join the conversation, don't touch with people who are talking. Another situation is that the conversant has paused, but did not select the next conversant, at this time, you can choose the following words. In this case, there may be competition, that is, more than two people are speaking, and some people should give up their rights according to the rules mentioned above, leaving only a person's speech.
Pay attention to others talk
There are many characteristics that have a verbal talk. If you talk about, you will pass the flash, and it is impossible to reverse it like a tape. The two sides of the conversation have been influenced. If you say something, you can't think of it, you need to revise what we say according to the previous people, our words also affect the words behind the two sides. Therefore, I am very important to listen carefully to others. Only if you understand others, we can only effectively respond. Only by paying attention, we may only accurately determine if the other party is talked, in order to pick up the words in time, rather than taking the liberty to interrupt others or to speak, but there is no reaction. The following is some of the bad obedience habits, and should be made to be corrected.
1. Why do you say when you think about or exercise your speech?
2. While listening to how bad it is to talk about talking, it will be much better when you change someone (or yourself).
3. On the one side, listen to some trivial things that don't do it.
4. For a pause, he will grab the words and pay attention to each word that the talk is said.
5. Desperately write every sentence that the tandem said. In order to improve your "listening", you can use a TV to practice. Choose a conversation show, sit down and listen, don't remember the notes. I found myself, hurry back to the show. Constantly exercise until you can insist on listening to a half-hour long program. http://vip.alei.net/xinghe-studio/bbs/dispbbs.asp?boardid=28&id=5937&page=2
